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“Me” versus “We” in the Family Business

Our family was watching Shark Tank together last night, and one of the companies making their pitch did something that I see far too often.

There were two women standing before the sharks, and in response to a question, one of them continually responded with “I have done this…”, “I can do that…”, while her partner stood there looking like a nobody.

Now it is highly probable that the woman using the first person singular pronoun “I” is in fact the only person who owns their company, or is at least the one at the top of their company food chain.

But if that is the case, what was the point of bringing along the other person? I see something similar, far too often, when shopping at local retailers. When I ask someone if they have a particular item, the reply sometimes comes “I have some in the back”, or “I’m getting some in next week.”

Well if the person saying this is the owner of the store, I certainly understand that, but when it comes from a teenager at a big box store, I think it is safe to say that they do not own the place, and therefore the item I am asking about is not “theirs” in any way.

In a family business context, this can be pretty tricky too. If Mom or Dad started the business without the kids, they can certainly be forgiven if they continue to say I rather than we. But what do they gain by that?

Maybe it is a cultural thing, but to me it smacks of some kind of ego gratification and making oneself seem important. But again, what is gained?

I daresay that in most contexts, a customer would feel more reassured knowing that they are dealing with a company comprised of several people who all care about serving them as a customer, rather than by just one, especially if the one is not “the boss”.

Back to the family scenario, so Dad keps saying “I” even when the children have taken on significant roles, no big deal, right? Well think about it from the perspective of those kids, how do they feel? Early on it is not much of an issue, but what about after 5 years, or 15, or 25?

To illustrate let me share a story about a related question, what the kids call their parents. As a child, I called my father “Daddy”. That is fine when you are 8, but at 28, or 38, it sounds pretty childish. I was ashamed to use the term, so I always found a way to avoid calling him anything. After all those years switching to “Dad” did not feel right.

With my own kids, I let them call me “Daddy” for the first couple of years, but then insisted they call me “Dad”, and they have been doing it ever since. (Okay, I’ll admit they sometimes call me Stevo, but never Daddy)

Old habits are hard to break, but they can be broken. What is needed first is the recognition that a change is needed, and then an insistance that the change be made. Then, with repetition, and more repetition, the change can become permanent.

The other thing to point out is the sooner you start, the easier it is.

The specific words that we use are often more important than we think they are, and when you switch to using “we” instead of “I”, it is rarely just a change in vocabulary.

The shift in attitude that comes along with the change in vocabulary is even more important. And don’t forget, it can come before OR after.

That’s right, you can change your attitude and decide to change the words you use, OR, you can change the words you use, and your attitude will eventually change too. Try it.

Steve Legler “gets” business families.
 
He understands the issues that families face, as well as how each family member sees things from their own viewpoint.
 
He specializes in helping business families navigate the difficult areas where the family and the business overlap, by listening to each person’s concerns and ideas.  He then helps the family work together to bridge gaps by building common goals, based on their shared values and vision.
 
His background in family business, his experience running his own family office, along with his education and training in coaching, facilitation, and mediation, make him uniquely suited to the role of advising business families and families of wealth.
 
He is the author of Shift your Family Business (2014), he received his MBA from the Richard  Ivey School of Business (UWO, 1991), is a CFA Charterholder (CFA Institute, 2002), a Family Enterprise Advisor (IFEA 2014), and has received the ACFBA and CFWA accreditations (Family Firm Institute 2014-2015).
 
He prides himself on his ability to help families create the harmony they need to support the legacy they want. To learn how, start by signing up for his monthly newsletter and weekly blogs here.
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Communication is a Two-Way Street

Communication is a topic that comes up often when discussing what family businesses need to work on. With ubiquitous communication technology today, you would think that a subject like communication would have ceased to be an issue, after all, everyone is always reachable, right? If only it were so easy.

In a business family, one problem that is difficult to address is communication that only goes in one direction, from the top, down. After all, if the parents raised their children by simply telling them what to do, why would anything be different when they are at work together?

One of the issues with that style is that when messages only travel in one direction, they sometimes begin to fall on deaf ears. The biggest problem with communication, as they say, is the illusion that it has taken place. That is difficult enough to deal with in the best of situations, but when it happens because the speaker is being tuned out, it is a symptom of much bigger problems.

I know that in my situation with my father, things evolved over time with respect to communication flow. I truly believe that he, like many parents, wanted to listen to what his kids had to say, but just took a long time to realize that what we had to say was not only valid and pertinent, but that it was in the interest of the whole family to work together in a more collaborative fashion.

I do not like being told what to do, and I think most people feel the same way. Management styles have thankfully evolved a great deal, and the autocratic way of yelling at people just seems like such a throwback these days.

But while you can suggest to people that is is more important to listen to others than to speak, that doesn’t mean they are all going to suddenly start doing so. Learning to truly listen takes a lot of practice, but it can be learned. Some people just seem to take longer to understand that they should listen to others.

A family business is a tricky environment due to the intersection of the family and the business, and unfortunately some old-fashioned parenting styles and management styles still linger. Most parents in the older generation eventually see the light, but others never do, to the point of devising ways to continue to control things, even from the grave.

These situations can be very frustrating for the next generation successors to deal with. It can be helpful in these situations for the siblings to get together and begin to work on their own communication, in the belief that they will most likely outlive their parents and therefore will eventually need to get along without the senior generation’s help or interference.

Sometimes brothers and sisters begin to meet, get along better and develop a consensus for how things will eventually be handled after their parents have passed away. Sometimes the parents become intrigued when they hear of these meetings, and ask to be invited to join.

I could not end this blog without mentioning Stephen R. Covey’s The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, which I read many years ago. My favourite habit, and one that some have called his greatest quote:

Habit 5: “Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood.”

If you can make that a habit, you have no choice but to listen more intently. If others are having difficulty doing so, the more they see you model this behaviour, the more likely they will eventually catch on as well.

It is certainly worth the effort. Then, if you can not only listen, but also learn to listen without judgment, you will see that you are really on to something, but that is a subject for another blog.

Steve Legler “gets” business families.
 
He understands the issues that families face, as well as how each family member sees things from their own viewpoint.
 
He specializes in helping business families navigate the difficult areas where the family and the business overlap, by listening to each person’s concerns and ideas.  He then helps the family work together to bridge gaps by building common goals, based on their shared values and vision.
 
His background in family business, his experience running his own family office, along with his education and training in coaching, facilitation, and mediation, make him uniquely suited to the role of advising business families and families of wealth.
 
He is the author of Shift your Family Business (2014), he received his MBA from the Richard  Ivey School of Business (UWO, 1991), is a CFA Charterholder (CFA Institute, 2002), a Family Enterprise Advisor (IFEA 2014), and has received the ACFBA and CFWA accreditations (Family Firm Institute 2014-2015).
 
He prides himself on his ability to help families create the harmony they need to support the legacy they want. To learn how, start by signing up for his monthly newsletter and weekly blogs here.
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NextGen Successors: Time to Step Up

One of the topics that comes up over and over again in the family business arena is that of the next generation and their preparedness to take over the reins.

Who has not heard at least one tale of a leader who is reluctant to let go, while claiming that the supposed successor is not yet seasoned enough to do the job. Many people will rightly point out that part of the leader’s job should have been to ensure that a successor would be ready, but they would be missing a big part of the picture.

The next generation (NextGen) also has an important duty here, and it sometimes gets forgotten. While the current leading generation should be helping prepare their successors, the following generation MUST not only follow along, but they actually need to take the lead.

I wrote a blog a couple of months ago (http://www.fbo7624.com/blog/pre-mediated-planning-makes-sense-me) about some of the great work of Dean Fowler. In that post, I concentrated on the phrase that he used, “Pre-Mediated Planning”, because it really resonnated with me, since it was a new term, but I also found it catchy, memorable, and frankly “blog-worthy”.

A few weeks ago I was invited to lead a workshop on the Family Circle at an upcoming Families in Business event at the University of Vermont (http://events.r20.constantcontact.com/register/event?oeidk=a07e933f02d3632cace&llr=rejdpeeab). While discussing the title and subject of my breakout session with Dann van der Vliet, the organiser, he mentioned that blog post as a possible idea.

I agreed, and decided that I should contact Dean Fowler to clear it with him, lest I be somehow misappropriating his work. When Dr. Fowler replied, he indicated that he was fine with my discussing the pre-mediated planning aspect part, but his main concern was that I was missing his main point. Ergo this blog post, to make sure that I give that point its due.

Fowler stresses that the families he has worked with that have had the most successful transitions, are the ones where the NextGen successors actively took on leadership roles. But we are not just talking about a leadership role in the company, but a leading role in the transition.

Another way to say this is that the successors did not sit back and wait to be given the company, they actually proved that they were ready and left no doubt that they were ready to take over the company.

Is this another one of those ideas that is easier said than done? I believe it is, but then again, most things that are worth doing are not easy. It is simple to explain, but not necessarily easy to accomplish. So how can we put the odds in our favour?

As is so often the case, the word “communication” comes immediately to mind, but unfortunately, imploring families to communicate better is rarely sufficient. They usually need more specific advice on who needs to communicate what, to whom, and how often. So here we go.

The two generations need to make it clear to each other that all the people involved have a realistic understanding of what needs to happen over the coming number of years. In fact, a great place to begin would be to define a timeline, so that both groups can work with a similar schedule.

The leading generation must be realistic and understand that they will not be around forever, and that it is in the entire family’s interest to make the business transition successful.

The NextGen need to take the proverbial bull by the horns, though, even if their elders are reluctant to see it the same way. They need to proactively go about the business of preparing themselves to take over, regardless of any attitudes of immortality that there parents generation might exhibit.

Yes, easier said than done, but the sooner it starts, the better for all.

 

Steve Legler “gets” business families.
 
He understands the issues that families face, as well as how each family member sees things from their own viewpoint.
 
He specializes in helping business families navigate the difficult areas where the family and the business overlap, by listening to each person’s concerns and ideas.  He then helps the family work together to bridge gaps by building common goals, based on their shared values and vision.
 
His background in family business, his experience running his own family office, along with his education and training in coaching, facilitation, and mediation, make him uniquely suited to the role of advising business families and families of wealth.
 
He is the author of Shift your Family Business (2014), he received his MBA from the Richard  Ivey School of Business (UWO, 1991), is a CFA Charterholder (CFA Institute, 2002), a Family Enterprise Advisor (IFEA 2014), and has received the ACFBA and CFWA accreditations (Family Firm Institute 2014-2015).
 
He prides himself on his ability to help families create the harmony they need to support the legacy they want. To learn how, start by signing up for his monthly newsletter and weekly blogs here.
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Oh Brother! Siblings in the Family Business

Many of the family issues that business families face come from the relationships between different generations. After a certain number of years, the eventual changes that will be required to move the business from one generation of leadership to the next, just become inevitable.

But in some families, where siblings work together, the intra-generational issues come to the forefront, and become the focal point for long periods of time. When you think about it, two family members from different generations might work together for two or three decades, but two siblings may be working together for four or five.

I thought about this subject this week, when I had lunch with two brothers, who have been working together for as long as I have known them, and that’s about 25 years. I will call them Jack and Ron, and they run a family business unlike any other that I know.

I am not talking about the industry that they are in, but the way their business seems like a true family business, in the way the two brothers have made the company their life’s work, and the way they complement each other in terms of skill sets.

The other thing that sets them apart is the fact that neither of them has any children, so there is no succeeding generation. They started this business without any direct help from their parents, have run it togther for some forty years, but there are no obvious heirs to whom they can pass their assets.

I don’t know any other single-generation sibling partnerships, but these two brothers work really well together, have amassed a number of assets by watching every dollar they spend, and finding great value in a variety of places.

They have numerous real estate holdings all over the city, and they can tell you stories about deadbeat tenants for hours on end.

Jack is five years older than Ron, but I had to ask them who was the older brother. Ron is more of a tinkerer, fixing machines and seemingly making something out of nothing, while Jack is the legal expert, and knows his way around the legal system better than most lawyers. I guess that when you have tenants who don’t pay their rent, you end up learning about the legal system pretty quickly.

But this blog is about family business, and I have known these guys for quite a while, and I felt compelled to write about them because even though they are not your run-of-the-mill multi-generational company, they do exhibit something that I find truly inspiring when I watch them work together.

Their parents were always very important to them, even though they were not involved in the business. And their parents clearly did a great job in instilling the right attitude in their sons.

There does not seem to be any jealousy between Jack and Ron, any ill will or desire to seem superior in any way. They work together the way any parent would be proud to see their children work together. Maybe if they had children following in their footsteps it would be different.

They have their own challenges due to their situation, though. With no heirs, it will probably be a charitable foundation that ends up owning most of the assets down the road, but that needs to be set up, and many decisions and steps need to be taken to make sure that happens, and will be handled the way they want.

I have no doubt that they will make all their decisions together, without much fuss, since they have been getting along so well together for as long as I have known them.

Getting along with your family, and those that you work with, is pretty much one of the keys to happiness, isn’t it? Too many business families seem to forget this.

Steve Legler “gets” business families.
 
He understands the issues that families face, as well as how each family member sees things from their own viewpoint.
 
He specializes in helping business families navigate the difficult areas where the family and the business overlap, by listening to each person’s concerns and ideas.  He then helps the family work together to bridge gaps by building common goals, based on their shared values and vision.
 
His background in family business, his experience running his own family office, along with his education and training in coaching, facilitation, and mediation, make him uniquely suited to the role of advising business families and families of wealth.
 
He is the author of Shift your Family Business (2014), he received his MBA from the Richard  Ivey School of Business (UWO, 1991), is a CFA Charterholder (CFA Institute, 2002), a Family Enterprise Advisor (IFEA 2014), and has received the ACFBA and CFWA accreditations (Family Firm Institute 2014-2015).
 
He prides himself on his ability to help families create the harmony they need to support the legacy they want. To learn how, start by signing up for his monthly newsletter and weekly blogs here.
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L’harmonie et l’héritage vont de paire

Je crois que la plupart des gens qui mènent des entreprises familiales veulent laisser un héritage à leurs enfants et petits-enfants. Mais je crois aussi que la plupart de ceux-ci ne comprennent pas assez bien l’importance que l’harmonie familiale jouera dans le succès du transfert de cet héritage.

Quand je regarde le mot “héritage” dans mon Petit Larousse, je trouve, juste en dessous d’un petit dessin d’un hérisson: “1. Ensemble des biens acquis ou transmis par voie de succession. 2. Ce que l’on tient de ses parents, des générations précédentes.”

Je suis présentement en train d’écrire mon premier livre sur le sujet des familles en affaires, et j’arrive vers la fin. En même temps, je travaille aussi sur mon nouveau site web, pour clarifier mon offre comme conseiller pour ces familles. Avec toutes les pensées qui me passent par la tête sur ces sujet dernièrement, cette semaine j’ai vécu ce qu’on appelle en anglais un “A-Ha Moment”, où, tout d’un coup, je venais de réaliser quelque chose pour la première fois.

Dans mon livre, je passe beaucoup de temps sur l’importance de la communication dans une famille, sur les conversations qui sont parfois difficiles, mais qui sont absolument nécessaires pour que chaque personne dans la famille se sent incluse dans ce qui se passe.

Dans le dévelopement de mon site web, ma conseillière m’a forcé à travailler sur mes valeurs personnelles, afin que je démontre bien qui je suis, et ce que je trouve le plus important pour que mes clients potentiels comprennent ma personalité, et peuvent comprendre comment je travaillerai avec eux.

Sur la question de ce que les familles cherchent, le mot “héritage” revenait souvent. Je suis convaincu que la grande majorité des gens dans la génération senior dans une famille en affaires veulent laisser un bel héritage à leurs successeurs.

Sur la question de ce que j’offre à ces familles, et des besoins et lacunes parmi ces familles, je revenait souvent sur le mot “harmonie”. Je suis également convaincu que dans une grande partie de ces familles, le niveau d’harmonie parmi les gens n’est pas assez élevé pour supporter l’héritage à long terme.

Voilà, mon “A-Ha”. Pour avoir un héritage qui durera, il est absolument nécessaire que l’harmonie familiale soit assez forte pour supporter l‘héritage.

J’adore les analogies, et j’essaye de trouver quelque chose qu’on peut visualiser pour mieux expliquer mon point. Jusqu’à date, la meilleure que j’ai trouvée est celle d’une tente de camping.

Quand on traverse un parc de camping, on voit beaucoup de tentes, mais ce qu’on voit est seulement le tissu des tentes. Ce qu’on voit, le tissu, l’extérieur, pour moi, c’est comme l’héritage.

Mais imaginez pour un moment comment le parc paraîtrait si quelqu’un enlevait les supports intérieurs qui font que les tentes se tiennent debout. Ou si on enlevait les ancrages qui sont très pratiques quand le vent se met à souffler.

Le système de support, les tiges de métal ou en fibre de verre que nous devons assembler et connecter, est essentiel au bon fonctionnement de la tente. Les ancrages sont aussi quelque chose qu’on ne devrait pas oublier.

Pour moi, tout ces éléments sont comme l’harmonie familiale.

Si on ne prend pas le temps, et si on ne fait pas l’effort de bien monter le système de support, la tente ne servira pas à grand chose.

Ceux qui se concentrent sur la grosseur de leur héritage, et qui négligent l’harmonie dans leur famille, risquent d’avoir des résultats décevants. Si vous ne faites pas les efforts requis sur le côté familial, les biens et l’argent que vous avez accummulés risquent de s’éparpiller assez rapidement après votre décès.

Votre héritage dépandrera sur le support que votre harmonie familiale pourra offrir comme appui.

Steve Legler “gets” business families.
 
He understands the issues that families face, as well as how each family member sees things from their own viewpoint.
 
He specializes in helping business families navigate the difficult areas where the family and the business overlap, by listening to each person’s concerns and ideas.  He then helps the family work together to bridge gaps by building common goals, based on their shared values and vision.
 
His background in family business, his experience running his own family office, along with his education and training in coaching, facilitation, and mediation, make him uniquely suited to the role of advising business families and families of wealth.
 
He is the author of Shift your Family Business (2014), he received his MBA from the Richard  Ivey School of Business (UWO, 1991), is a CFA Charterholder (CFA Institute, 2002), a Family Enterprise Advisor (IFEA 2014), and has received the ACFBA and CFWA accreditations (Family Firm Institute 2014-2015).
 
He prides himself on his ability to help families create the harmony they need to support the legacy they want. To learn how, start by signing up for his monthly newsletter and weekly blogs here.
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Pre-Mediated Planning? Sounds Good to Me

Sometimes when you hear a new term it takes a bit of time to let its true meaning sink in. It happened to me this week, but the more that I think about the term, the better I like it.

About six months ago, I joined a group called the Purposeful Planning Institute, in large part because the term “Purposeful” really resonnated with me. If we are going to make plans (usually a good idea) why shouldn’t we do so with a true and well-thought-out purpose?

The PPI holds an annual Rendez-Vous in Colorado every summer, and I have already made plans to attend, because I really love the idea of exchanging stories and ideas with like-minded people. There will surely be at least one blog post as a result of that trip.

But one of the coolest features of the PPI is the weekly conference call every Tuesday at noon. The quality of the speakers is exceptional, and this week we got to hear from Dean Fowler, who has been working with business families for about 30 years. Most of his clients are third- and fourth-generation, because he has consciously chosen to work with successful families.

Fowler’s early career had him working with dysfunctional families, usually in cases where a will and estate plan were contested after the wealthy parents passed away. As he explained in the preamble to his talk, those estate plans did not fail because they were created by bad lawyers, bad accountants, and bad life insurance people. There was something else going on (or NOT going on) among the family members.

Having worked with both dysfunctional and successful families, he was able to see what worked and what did not. I realize that I will not be doing his entire talk justice here, but there were two key take-aways that I got from it.

The first is Pre-Mediated Planning and the second is a Proactive Next Generation. Proactive is a word that took some time to grow on me, and I will surely pick up the subject of the next generation taking on a more active role in a future blog, but the Pre-Mediated Planning was what stood out for me, and what I really want to zero in on today.

By definition, Fowler’s work as a mediator was required because there was a disagreement AFTER the fact. Plans were put into place, the person responsible for the plans passed away, and the successors disagreed with the plans, so a mediator is needed.

Pre-mediated planning, on the other hand, makes sure that the plans are understood BEFORE the person passes away, which allows the plans to be re-worked. Taking the time to explain, assess the reaction, accept some feedback, revise the plans, explain them again, discuss them with the family, etc. will always be time well spent in advance, which will avoid the need for costly, gut-wrenching, family-destroying fights afterwards.

So why don’t more families do this kind of planning? My guess is that the major reason is that so many of the senior generation believe that they know best, and they still view their children as just that, children. Fowler also mentioned that he refers to adult offspring as “former children”, to force the parents to accept that they are now adults, capable of their own independent thoughts without being told what to do by Mommy and Daddy.

Of course the greatest challenge here comes down to communication, as it usually does. You really “gotta wanna” do this, to do it right. It is much easier to do nothing and fight it out after. But that is so much uglier, so sad and so unnecessary too.

Steve Legler “gets” business families.
 
He understands the issues that families face, as well as how each family member sees things from their own viewpoint.
 
He specializes in helping business families navigate the difficult areas where the family and the business overlap, by listening to each person’s concerns and ideas.  He then helps the family work together to bridge gaps by building common goals, based on their shared values and vision.
 
His background in family business, his experience running his own family office, along with his education and training in coaching, facilitation, and mediation, make him uniquely suited to the role of advising business families and families of wealth.
 
He is the author of Shift your Family Business (2014), he received his MBA from the Richard  Ivey School of Business (UWO, 1991), is a CFA Charterholder (CFA Institute, 2002), a Family Enterprise Advisor (IFEA 2014), and has received the ACFBA and CFWA accreditations (Family Firm Institute 2014-2015).
 
He prides himself on his ability to help families create the harmony they need to support the legacy they want. To learn how, start by signing up for his monthly newsletter and weekly blogs here.
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C’est pas juste l’argent

Les gens parlent de l’argent et y pensent souvent. C’est normal puisque c’est perçu comme la source de bien des problèmes, et surtout de leurs solutions. Mais souvent ça serait préférable de regarder plus loin, et on verra que ce n’est pas juste l’argent qui est en cause.

Quelques exemples pour illustrer: Les premières fois que je faisais du bénévolat dans une banque alimentaire, je voulais souvent plonger ma main dans ma poche pour sortir un $1 ou un $2 pour dépanner quelqu’un, mais il a fallu que je me retienne. Les clients sont obligés de débourser $1 par adulte pour avoir droit à leur boîte de nourriture. Les règles sont là pour de bonnes raisons et en intervenant comme tel, j’aurais pu nuire à celles-ci. La première fois que la directrice m’a vu sortir mon portefeuille, le regard qu’elle m’a donné me l’a tout de suite expliqué.

J’ai une soeur qui travaille dans le système de la santé et ma conjointe travaille avec des OSBL. Elles sont tous les deux témoins de manques de budgets, et ce sur une base quotidienne. Mais les deux sont aussi d’accord que ce n’est pas l’argent qui manque le plus. C’est toujours facile de dire qu’avec plus d’argent, tout irait mieux, mais ce n’est pas toujours la vérité. De meilleures structures, de la gouvernance, de l’organisation, un coup de pouce dans la bonne direction, ce sont tous des façons pour améliorer les choses sans ajouter plus d’argent.

Prenons maintenant l’un de mes sujets préférés, l’héritage que nous voulons laisser à nos enfants et petit-enfants. Est-ce que c’est simplement de l’argent qu’on voudrait leur laisser? Est-ce que c’est juste de l’argent qu’ils veulent recevoir? J’espère que ça ne sera pas le cas pour moi et mes enfants.

Quand je dis que ce n’est pas juste de l’argent, vous pourrez croire que j’oublie d’autres actifs tangibles qui ont une valeur monétaire, comme des bijoux, de l’art, l’immobilier, mais ce n’est même pas ça mon point. Je parle ici, par contre, d’intangibles.

J’espère ne pas avoir perdu trop de monde. J’espère que vous n’allez pas tous penser que je parle de l’amour. Mais oui, l’amour en fait partie; peut-être une très grande partie. J’aime mes enfants, vous aimez vos enfants, nous le savons tous. Mais comme parents, comment est-ce que cet amour se manifeste chez nos enfants?

Une lacune que je vois trop souvent chez les parents, c’est qu’ils ne prennent pas le temps d’éduquer leurs enfants sur ce qui est important dans la vie. Je parle des valeurs de la famille, d’où ils viennent, où ils sont, et où ils s’en vont. Nous sommes très loin de parler d’argent, n’est-ce pas?

Mais dans les familles dynastiques que nous connaissons tous, avez-vous déjà pensé ce qu’ils ont tous en commun? Ils ont tous eu la chance de partir du bon pied, souvent grâce à un entrepreneur dans leur arbre généologique, mais quels sont les atouts qui leur ont ménés où ils sont, plusieurs générations plus tard?

Ils se sont tous organisés pour comprendre ce qui est important dans leur famille avec les responsabilités, les structures, la vision familiale à long terme, et l’esprit de rester en famille, en sachant d’où ils viennent et où il sent vont, en famille.

Je crois que comme parents, nous devons ces leçons à nos enfants, pour qu’ils puissent ensuite les transmettre à leurs enfants. Parce que si c’est “juste l’argent” qu’on leur laisse, bien, ça risque de durer moins longtemps, et on risque d’avoir raté un peu notre coup.

Steve Legler “gets” business families.
 
He understands the issues that families face, as well as how each family member sees things from their own viewpoint.
 
He specializes in helping business families navigate the difficult areas where the family and the business overlap, by listening to each person’s concerns and ideas.  He then helps the family work together to bridge gaps by building common goals, based on their shared values and vision.
 
His background in family business, his experience running his own family office, along with his education and training in coaching, facilitation, and mediation, make him uniquely suited to the role of advising business families and families of wealth.
 
He is the author of Shift your Family Business (2014), he received his MBA from the Richard  Ivey School of Business (UWO, 1991), is a CFA Charterholder (CFA Institute, 2002), a Family Enterprise Advisor (IFEA 2014), and has received the ACFBA and CFWA accreditations (Family Firm Institute 2014-2015).
 
He prides himself on his ability to help families create the harmony they need to support the legacy they want. To learn how, start by signing up for his monthly newsletter and weekly blogs here.
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Season’s Bloggings

At this time of year, we get to see a whole bunch of retrospectives of all the events that happened over the past 12 months. These reports are great filler pieces for news organisations at a time of year that is usually slow anyway, so they are the perfect fit.

Personally, I usually find these things pretty lame, and certainly not something to look forward to. The one exception would be “Top 10” highlight reels on sports channels, or maybe some bloopers.

But just because this season isn’t great for TV, doesn’t mean it isn’t a great time for some personal retrospection. (Yes, that IS a word, I just checked).

When I was younger, the Christmas season didn’t really do much for me, and I even went through a kind of “grinch” phase, during which I didn’t buy gifts for anybody. But alas, parenthood changed that.

When my kids were younger and still in the Santa phase, Christmas was lots of fun, and I can still picture the huge mess in our living room after the gifts were opened, since the gifts came not just from Mr. Claus, but from grandparents, aunts, and uncles too.

With teenagers now, (OK, strictly speaking one is still a 12 and a half-year-old) things have shifted once again. Now I enjoy looking back over the year and noting the progress they have made in so many areas of their lives.

The old saying “they grow up so fast” is so true, it’s almost scary. One year is a long time to you when you are a kid, but when you are pushing 50, it goes by in a flash. I still have trouble figuring out how so much can happen AND time can go by so fast. If so much is happening, shouldn’t it be taking longer?

Alright, maybe I am getting too existential here, but ‘tis the season, isn’t it? We look back on the year that just was and marvel at how things have changed, and you almost have to shake your head when you try to look ahead a year and think of where you will be next Christmas.

But as scary as it might be, I believe that everyone really should do it, even if it you only do it once a year. If you wanna do something even more fun, project out 5 years and look at how old everyone in your family will be at the end of 2018. Yikes!

If you work in a family business, it is even more important to undertake this kind of exercise, because there are so many moving parts to begin with, that when you throw in the time element, things can really start to get interesting.

If you don’t have an operating business but are lucky enough to be in the HNW (high net worth) category, look ahead and think about how you want things to go in your future, and what your kids’ roles will be as they age, and as YOU age.

This is the time of year that we usually see family members, some of whom we may not see as often as we would like to. It is a great time to work on improving communication with everyone, and even to talk about the future together.

How many of you are up to it? Good luck to those who do, I believe that you will be glad you did.

Steve Legler “gets” business families.
 
He understands the issues that families face, as well as how each family member sees things from their own viewpoint.
 
He specializes in helping business families navigate the difficult areas where the family and the business overlap, by listening to each person’s concerns and ideas.  He then helps the family work together to bridge gaps by building common goals, based on their shared values and vision.
 
His background in family business, his experience running his own family office, along with his education and training in coaching, facilitation, and mediation, make him uniquely suited to the role of advising business families and families of wealth.
 
He is the author of Shift your Family Business (2014), he received his MBA from the Richard  Ivey School of Business (UWO, 1991), is a CFA Charterholder (CFA Institute, 2002), a Family Enterprise Advisor (IFEA 2014), and has received the ACFBA and CFWA accreditations (Family Firm Institute 2014-2015).
 
He prides himself on his ability to help families create the harmony they need to support the legacy they want. To learn how, start by signing up for his monthly newsletter and weekly blogs here.
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Ça finit quand, ça?

Depuis la fin janvier de cette année, je me suis lancé dans le domaine des entreprises familiales, en suivant un cours qui s’appelle le “Family Enterprise Advisor Program”.

Si vous lisez le Globe and Mail, vous avez peut-être vu l’annonce d’une pleine page qui a passé le 18 octobre, avec les noms et les photos des finissants des programmes de Toronto et de Vancouver.

Mais ce qui est drôle dans tout ça, c’est que le programme n’était pas encore terminé, puisque j’étais de retour à Toronto pour notre présentation finale le 1er novembre.

Certains membres de mon équipe de projet ont reçu des commentaires de proches, qui les ont félicité pour avoir fini, mais pendant ce temps, on continuait notre travail.

Mais ça finit quand? Bien, le programme vient de se terminé, et nous sommes enfin gradué. Mais ça ne sera pas encore fini non plus. Oui, nous aurons terminé le programme comme tel. Mais pour avoir la désignation “FEA”, il nous reste encore quelques étapes.

Il nous reste un examen écrit en novembre, et ensuite un examen oral en février (Yes! Un autre voyage à Toronto…en hiver en plus!).

Je ne mentionne pas ça pour me plaindre, mais pour illustrer quelque chose. Les affaires qui valent la peine de faire, valent le temps que ça prend pour les faire. Je ne sais pas si j’ai mal traduit une expression anglaise, mais je crois que vous me comprenez.

Ça me rappelle les commentaires de certains de mes proches concernant mon retour au études pour un Xième fois. “Quand est-ce que tu auras enfin fini tes études?”

Pour moi, ça ne finira peut-être jamais, et j’aime ça comme ça. C’est vrai que dans ma jeunesse, je faisais mes études pour prouver quelque chose à mes parents et à moi-même. Mais en approchant la cinquantaine
ce n’est plus mon cas.

J’ai adoré le programme et je le recommande fortement à toute personne qui travail dans le domaine des entreprises familiales. La plupart de ceux qui ont suivi le cours avec moi sont des comptables, des vendeurs de produits d’assurances et des planificateurs financiers.

Pour moi, je suis un peu comme un intru dans la gang, puisque je parviens du monde d’une entreprise que mon père avait parti, et que nous avons vendu quand j’étais dans la vingtaine. Depuis ce temps, je m’occupe de tout ce qui restait, incluant l’immobilier, la propriété intellectuelle et les investissements.

En réalité, durant les classes, je m’identifiais beaucoup plus avec les profs qui donnaient le cours, qu’avec ceux qui apprenaient avec moi.

Pour ceux qui travaillent dans une compagnie familiale, vous pouvez probablement identifier aussi avec le titre de ce blog. Ça ne finit jamais non plus!

Développer son entreprise et les capacités des membres de la famille à s’en occuper, sont les genres d’affaires avec lesquels on n’en fini jamais.

Aussitôt qu’on se sent confortable d’avoir régler un dossier, deux ou trois autres seront déjà sur le point de demander notre attention.

Je suis parmi ceux qui voient la vie comme une escapade, ou un voyage sans fin. Je n’ai pas hâte que ça finisse non plus.

Ce blogue, par contre, va finir bientôt. Mais n’inquiètez-vous pas, il y en aura un autre la semaine prochaine. Mais celui-ci prend fin ici, maintenant.

Steve Legler “gets” business families.
 
He understands the issues that families face, as well as how each family member sees things from their own viewpoint.
 
He specializes in helping business families navigate the difficult areas where the family and the business overlap, by listening to each person’s concerns and ideas.  He then helps the family work together to bridge gaps by building common goals, based on their shared values and vision.
 
His background in family business, his experience running his own family office, along with his education and training in coaching, facilitation, and mediation, make him uniquely suited to the role of advising business families and families of wealth.
 
He is the author of Shift your Family Business (2014), he received his MBA from the Richard  Ivey School of Business (UWO, 1991), is a CFA Charterholder (CFA Institute, 2002), a Family Enterprise Advisor (IFEA 2014), and has received the ACFBA and CFWA accreditations (Family Firm Institute 2014-2015).
 
He prides himself on his ability to help families create the harmony they need to support the legacy they want. To learn how, start by signing up for his monthly newsletter and weekly blogs here.
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Teach Your Children Well

Today, I want to try to tie together a couple of themes that occurred to me this week. I began the week in London Ontario, where I attended the Ivey Case Teaching Workshop at my alma mater.

Then after I got back to my office I came across an interesting report about how and when wealthy families handle information about their wealth. I found it alarming and really difficult to comprehend.

Back in the spring, I shared in this space that I had been bitten by the teaching bug. As part of being a student in the Family Enterprise Advisor Program, the return to the classroom had me feeling that I had more in common with the people at the front of the room than the people who were there to learn.

Having done my MBA in a “case school”, where business cases form the vast majority of the learning, I resolved that when I did get into teaching, my preferred instruction method would to use cases for most of the learning.

For the final day of the workshop they asked for a volunteer and I am so glad that I stepped up and lived the experience. It is interactive learning at its finest, where the teacher is more of a discussion facilitator than anything else. It is a really cool feeling to have a bunch of bright students all wanting to contribute, and just trying to coordinate it all in some meaningful way.

I loved it and I want to do more of it. And I will.

Now, on to the wealthy families report I came across. Here is a link:

http://familyofficenews.wordpress.com/2013/08/29/wealthy-parents-fear-kids-cant-handle-family-fortune/

Let me pull out the two most alarming stats from this survey. Only 42% of the over 700 respondents believe that their children are well prepared to handle their inheritance. About 20% believe their children should wait until they are 40 before the family fortune is disclosed.

Yes, you read that right, DISCLOSED. Not that they should wait until they are 40 to handle the “family fortune”, which would be interesting in its own right. But these people think it is normal and appropriate to keep their children in the dark for 40 years.

Okay, so just how does that work. You live a low-key lifestyle and pretend that you are just another upper-middle class family, I guess. And then one day, once your kids are finally “old enough”, you will let them in on the family secret. “Surprise! You are going to inherit tons of money some day!”

And they wonder why their children are not well prepared to handle the inheritance.

I get the “aversion to discuss wealth”, and I get the “not wanting to negatively impact their work ethic”, believe me I do. But there are other ways to take care of those issues.

It all comes down to open and honest communications. They are your children. You are their parents. You are a family. The parents are supposed to teach their children all the stuff that they don’t learn at school. This includes work ethic and how to handle money.

Back to the teaching workshop, I said it was interactive learning, with the teacher acting as a facilitator. I guess I didn’t realize it until I sat down to write this blog, but that is almost a description of my parenting style.

Thankfully I have a co-teacher called Mom, and the class size is only 2. But if our kids are not prepared to handle information about our family wealth until they are 40, then somebody will have screwed up somewhere, it in won’t be the kids.

 

Steve Legler “gets” business families.
 
He understands the issues that families face, as well as how each family member sees things from their own viewpoint.
 
He specializes in helping business families navigate the difficult areas where the family and the business overlap, by listening to each person’s concerns and ideas.  He then helps the family work together to bridge gaps by building common goals, based on their shared values and vision.
 
His background in family business, his experience running his own family office, along with his education and training in coaching, facilitation, and mediation, make him uniquely suited to the role of advising business families and families of wealth.
 
He is the author of Shift your Family Business (2014), he received his MBA from the Richard  Ivey School of Business (UWO, 1991), is a CFA Charterholder (CFA Institute, 2002), a Family Enterprise Advisor (IFEA 2014), and has received the ACFBA and CFWA accreditations (Family Firm Institute 2014-2015).
 
He prides himself on his ability to help families create the harmony they need to support the legacy they want. To learn how, start by signing up for his monthly newsletter and weekly blogs here.
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