Which One Actually Started with Nothing?

The Power of Needing to Put Food on the Table

There’s no shortage of rags to riches stories that many of us are familiar with.

You know the kind, the immigrant who arrives with a suitcase and a few dollars and then goes on to create a hugely successful business.

That could actually be my Dad, except perhaps for the adverb “hugely”, depending on who you want to compare him to.

People like that are often said to have “started with nothing”.

This week I want to look at that and challenge the idea about “nothing” that some of us throw around.

Section 01

Private School and a Trust Fund

A generation or two removed from such success stories, you may find someone who had everything handed to them.

Access to the finest private schools, a trust fund, perhaps even a leg up on a place at one of the finer and more selective Universities.

Must be nice.

Of course, now I could be describing my own offspring, but I digress.

These people are definitely not starting with nothing.

But in many ways, as I’ll now try to argue, they’re at a disadvantage to the hungry immigrant who had no choice but to bust his ass to put food on the table.

Section 02

The Entitled Rising Generation — Who’s at Fault?

I’ve had the privilege of working with a number of multigenerational families who have lived some version of this story.

The wealth creator began with the goal of feeding their family, which can be quite motivating, compared to having one’s family go hungry.

Along the way, they discovered they had an ability to grow a business beyond what they likely initially envisioned.

Through a combination of hard work, great decision-making, the right appetite for risk, and a little luck, they ended up being very successful financially.

They raise their children specifically to NOT have to endure everything that they had to endure.

And some of them turn around and blame their kids for being entitled.

Section 03

How Much Farther Up Do I Want to Go?

Let’s think about these rising generation family members who seemingly start out with so much.

They received a top-notch education and along the way they rubbed shoulders with all sorts of others who came from the same social strata, so the social capital they have is enormous, even though they probably don’t realize it.

They’re well positioned to succeed in any number of areas.

And yet, in large part thanks to starting off where they are, they aren’t always sure what to do next.

That drive their forefathers had to simply put food on the table is missing.

Are they starting with nothing, well, no, not really.

But my argument is that if they don’t have the same drive, that’s actually quite normal.

Section 04

My Kingdom for a Purpose

There was a time in my own life when I felt lost and without direction.

I spent a few years getting educated in various fields and trying on different careers and was crying out for some kind of sign to give me some purpose.

As I wrote recently in On the Challenges of Finding Purpose and Family Engagement,

That drive to do something worthwhile, when there’s always been plenty of food on the table, can be hard to find for many.

Section 05

Nothing Behind, So Everything Is Ahead

Let’s look at it another way, by contrasting “nothing” with its opposite, “everything”.

That hungry person had nothing behind him, so every possibility lay ahead, and they took the right steps and worked hard and built it all.

Their offspring start off already having everything, so the drive to build more will likely not be as strong.

But they do actually have a lot ahead of them that they could do and have many advantages to help them have their own fantastic achievements.

Section 06

Encouraging Them to Try Different Avenues

When I work with younger members of successful families, I always want to encourage them to find something that they enjoy and that drives them.

It doesn’t have to be the business of their parents and needs to be something that excites them when they wake up in the morning.

They already have a lot, but if they can find something of their own to work towards, their odds of having an enjoyable life increase.

Hopefully their family won’t judge them and will allow them the opportunity to explore.